Hope you all are having a nice holy week and that your Easter is being spent with the people you love. I am now nearly two thirds into a ninety day rehab program to try to change my life to the better, and to get back on track, and so hopefully back on the road again soon.
All that beer got to me in the end. I felt I was really loosing control of my life. I am reading a lot about psychology nowadays and I am in a very educational period regarding myself and life in general. The program I’m in follows the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, and we are also encouraged to go to AA meetings at least once a week. The religious aspect of it is shunned and avoided though, I just can’t take the God and all that spirit stuff they go on and on about.
I have some good days in physical and mental separation from the madness downtown, because the clinic I’m at is located in the outskirts of Oslo. I miss my drinking buddies a lot, but have now realized that I unfortunately and of course need to break with my old life after my stay here. Brutally perhaps, but absolutely necessary.
If I enter back into my old environment again, it’s right back to exactly the life I had with; loss of feelings, whining, self-deception, apathy and numbness. Bright, describes the coming period this springtime and Easter. I am starting to see a brighter light and somehow I feel lighter too. And I hope to see you again soon, perhaps in a different light.